Thursday, February 14, 2008

Marginalizing (again) the biggest moron of old time

As you regular readers know, I don't have much time to blog anymore. But tonight I checked my blog meters to see who's been coming in via other sites' referrals, and guess who I found? A cockroach, crawling out of the darkness.

So the old asshole decides to insult my woman, calling her a "mail-order bride" just because she happens to be Filipina. Number one, it's an incredibly racist thing to say; as the commenter said, it's really low.

Number two, nothing could be further from the truth. She's not a mail-order bride. That's it. No matter how many times the putz spews it out of his beet-colored face, whether it's about American Idol or someone else's woman, 2 plus 2 does not equal 5. He's always been a flat-out liar, and he tells me I'm "self-oblivious" when he need only look in his compact, then take the lipstick out of his purse and write "liar" across his forehead. Among his other lies are what he claims is my "crush" on Chris Daugherty. Where the hell did he get that? The simple explanation is that he's the closet homo, transferring his frustrations upon someone who bests him intellectually.

Number three, anytime he'd like to say something to my face, he can go right ahead, naming the time and place convenient to us both, but he'll find the experience most unpleasant. It's a good thing he's mandated to have health insurance in Massachusetts, because he'll need it once I'm done smashing his sorry face through the pavement.

Now, that third I don't expect any sort of response to -- he's always been a coward, and he'll just run and hide, like always.

I don't talk a lot about my personal life. I'm not like my friend Jackie Passey, who very much based her popular blog on what she was doing (particularly her current relationships). That's not what my blog is about. I started it mostly to talk about free trade, and resultingly, most of you aren't here to read my stories of traveling, going to various types of meetings and performances, hanging out, street altercations, etc. You're here to read about economics, politics, and occasional social commentary, which unfortunately I can't provide regularly now. I've wanted to blog about meeting Doug Bandow (what a great guy) for the second time, but I haven't had the time.

Nonetheless, I'll divulge a few juicy(?) details tonight, to add fresh cement to the fact that the guy is a complete liar. I've known the future Mrs. Eidelbus for nearly a year. We liked each other from the beginning, and as this Massachusetts moron knows, she and I were on Boracay's famous white sand beach, watching the sunset, when I asked her to marry me. It couldn't have been a more quintessential moment to propose. Not to brag, but how many of you, men and women both, get that kind of setting, hmm?

Well, this schmuck is clearly jealous. First, that the love of my life is more beautiful than he could ever imagine, and second, that he couldn't even afford one plane ticket out there, let alone two.

I took these a few minutes after she said yes, so we could capture the moment. It was some evening. Her mother, elder brother and cousin came with us to Boracay. I was in their room at the hotel, when my not-yet fiancée decided to take our picture. She picked up my camera case and, miraculously, didn't feel something in the side pocket. Normally it's for batteries, but that day I had put inside it...the ring! That way we could go for a walk, and I'd know exactly where the ring would be, instead of possibly getting lost in my pocket. But she didn't feel it, and suddenly while sitting on the beach, I quickly retrieved the jewelry, put it in my hand, and pressed mine flat against hers.

Shall we talk about legal issues? I've thrown too much money away with lawyers who charged me hundreds of dollars, because I didn't really know and also didn't know they didn't really know, either. The long and short of it is that we'll have to get married twice. We only need one wedding, a church wedding, but it would have to be in the Philippines. My mother-in-law is the secretary of her local church, and I willingly submit to her desire that the wedding be there. But that isn't good enough for the U.S. government, so we'll have to have a civil wedding here first.

That's the easy part. For the church wedding, we have to plan a trip to the Philippines. We'll have to time things with my relatives in Pampanga (a couple hours north of Manila), Colorado and England, all of whom naturally would be missed if they didn't come. Oh, and my in-laws are all over Mindanao, Iloilo and even Luzon.

No small part of my trips to the Philippines are to meet as many of my in-laws as possible. My father-in-law passed away several years ago, before I could meet him, but this last time I could finally meet my new uncle, the eldest brother, who gave me formal permission to marry his niece. Filipinos are exceedingly traditional, and I made sure to ask my mother-in-law for permission, the night before I actually proposed. I have two new cousins who were my "attorneys" when I presented myself to the two sides of their family, vouching for my character.

Not the least of complications is that I haven't been Catholic since childhood. For a long time, the Catholic Church has allowed its members to marry baptized non-Catholic Christians, provided the non-Catholic spouse agreed to raise any children as Catholics. Since the early 1960s, the Catholic Church no longer required that, but it's still a complex issue.

Last but not least, the idiot unwittingly accused Staples of airbrushing. We had the picture taken by a professional photographer, no airbrushing needed, and I had it scanned at Staples for our Christmas cards last year. There are two simple reasons that the "topography" of my face looks very different. The picture on my blog is a grainy one that I've used since 2005. And last year, I kinda lost 40 pounds. The rest of us know that it makes a difference in your facial features, but this dimwit apparently didn't scour my blog that thoroughly.

Even before I lost weight, I already could get "action" with girls. After slimming down, I could talk to most any girl I wanted, but it never worked out for two reasons. I never met any who I liked, with the exception of one who things simply couldn't work out with (and I wasted a couple of years trying to make something work that couldn't). Other than that, blah, a guy and his buddies go to a bar, he meets a bunch of girls, and he realizes that each one is the quintessentially superficial American girl with those god-awful "90210"/"Legally Blonde" mannerisms and accent. So I kept focusing on my career, watching various friends hook up, move in together and get married, only to watch some of them later on break up.

It's true that you'll find true love when you're not looking. One day, there she was. It really pleased my mother and aunts, who always wanted me to marry a Filipina. She's kind, gentle and loving, besides intelligent and very practical about money, which is more than what Nuthead can claim about his wife. She does get a bit jealous, which isn't a problem, when other girls flirt with me. Like other people, I enjoy the feeling of being flirted with, but I can't have that now. Faithfulness is not just with the body, but the heart too. A faithful heart makes it easy to ignore smiles coupled with winks coupled with hairtosses, like one earlier today. So hey, if he wants to call me a "babe magnet," he said it, I didn't.

In any case, the guy is a jerk as always. He's a typical liberal -- when he can't refute, he resorts to insults. I could stoop to his level, but I won't. I'll simply remind him that my challenge above has no expiration date, and how about let's see him post a picture of his ugly mug and his wife? (Just give us fair warning, I don't want the horrid visages to burn out my LCD screen.) And I suppose I'll be just a touch insulting when I say I'm quite satisfied that, unlike him, I don't beat my wife or have to pay her for sex.

I always said I wanted civil discourse, but he began the flamefest by making personal attacks, and at that point, the gloves came off.

On a final note, not to make myself out to be a saint or anything, but many public schools in the Philippines are attended by children from invariably impoverished families. We're talking dirt poor. My family here has for years been helping our family over there, but I've taken it a step further with charity toward perfect strangers. I've become the benefactor of a certain elementary school, paying for children whose families can't afford to send them to school, buying supplies like , and introducing the principal to various U.S. charities that might be able to help. Now this liberal nitwit wants to insult an entire country of 80 million people -- let's see what he's doing to make their lives better.

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Blogger Perry Eidelbus said...

"Contractor," next time don't post something that's clearly a lie, especially after I already refuted it.

Your garbage has been deleted.

Thursday, February 14, 2008 6:46:00 AM  
Blogger ChrisJ said...


There are a lot of people out there that disagree with you on a myriad of issues. And the Libertarian in me strongly believes in their right to disagree with anything anyone says, regardless of the logical properties (or lack thereof) of their argument.

That being said, nobody can change your relationship with your lovely bride to be, except you and her. No matter what anyone says, your relationship is yours and yours alone.

The point here is that no matter what you say, how often you say it, or the amount of force behind those words, won't change the minds or hearts of a few bigots.

Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Don't let this turd make you feel like you have to defend your relationship.

If this guys entire argument against all that we believe in (broadly: free market economics) is that you have a mail order bride, that's his problem. The rational of us know that he's an idiot, and calling your fiancee a "mail order bride" does nothing to further his argument. But, it DOES make him look mean and petty.

To sum up: you don't need to defend her honor. There is nothing to defend against.

Thursday, February 14, 2008 7:01:00 AM  
Blogger CaptiousNut said...

I would like to wish you and your bride-to-be many years of happiness.

Thursday, February 14, 2008 7:31:00 AM  
Blogger Steven said...

Temper, temper, mon capitaine! (There's your Star Trek quote for the day...)

This piece of sewer sludge is not worth your time or energy.

Friday, February 15, 2008 1:44:00 AM  
Blogger Perry Eidelbus said...

Chrisj: I tend to let other people prove themselves inferior. Some of my detractors simply have no class, as in this case. Now if someone has a beef with me, fine, but I draw the line when the person lies about my family.

Steve: Things seem to be all right now.

cn: I accept your words as an apology, though your words are still empty.

Saturday, February 16, 2008 2:10:00 PM  
Blogger Perry Eidelbus said...

Oh, and cn: you can take down my pictures anytime. They're not your property, and you do not have permission to use them. Thanks.

Saturday, February 16, 2008 2:15:00 PM  
Blogger Contractor said...

As much as I see that you aren't feeling the love for me, yes, I have this page on my subscription list. Those pics are hosted on blogger/blogspot and are the property or Google. You have limited rights. At the very least, Creative Commons applies without needing to be implied...the US is a signatory to that.

They are hosted on a public service by google, your posting them elsewhere is secondary and copyrights can not apply to the pics linked there...only your original content on that page.

Saturday, February 16, 2008 2:28:00 PM  
Blogger Perry Eidelbus said...

The copies he made are currently hosted on Google's servers.

The originals belong to me. Creative Commons doesn't apply here, because I never released the rights to them being used publicly.

Got it, idiot?

Saturday, February 16, 2008 2:29:00 PM  

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